Harassment In The Public School System

Our situation started as intimidation of our daughter by the mother of another child. She was at school one day to visit her kid and was on the playground watching them play, our kids got into some little argument, nothing physical, just bickering. Something that any normal person would have split up and been done with.

In our case this was the first step in a campaign to humiliate and scare our little girl (then 7 years old) and the impact on our child has been substantial, though she has in the last few months really come out of the shell this "lady" put her in, there are still remnants of fear of adults we are working on.

We took it up with the school principal, and the public school system will, using any means necessary, do everything they can to avoid taking any action against anyone. It was only after some very angry meetings that she was ejected from school grounds...that's when the real hell began...

Ever since that episode, which was about two years ago, the school has been admirable in keeping the kids (who actually like each other) in different classes and that's fine, however, they will do anything to not upset either party, whether right or wrong. Then, when asked for logic in their decision making at time, they brush us off and refer us to their school attorney.

Honestly, it's not their job to mediate quarreling parents, just to protect the kids so I understand it, but it's frustrating as hell.

This is all in the realm of political correctness, and the school not wanting to get sued by anyone for anything (which is understandable in today's sue happy society). This ordeal has cost our school district thousands and thousands of dollars to draft letters to us both with different positions the school holds in situations, all of which have to be run through the attorney, including many other issues. I would guess it would simply be quicker, cheaper and more decisive to simply call out the harasser, let them take the school to court, and be done with it. I assume she threatened such, as I know for a fact she threatened at least one other organization when she didn't get her way (and never did follow through).

Do not expect any support and assistance from the higher levels of administration in your public school system, they can't, or won't, for fear of lawsuits and public scrutiny, all they will do is keep the kids safe. We have found as good as possible support from the lower levels of the school hierarchy. Teachers and principals seem genuinely concerned and willing to help, within the regulations of law and district, but above that, it's all about not getting sued and keeping people happy so they can continually ask for more public money, not necessarily doing the right thing.

The downside of this political correctness is that a parent only needs to say "my kid as afraid of this person" to get the school to take protective action, which may sound like a good thing, and erring on the side of caution, it is. But for us it has occasionally resulted in unfair restrictions or hassles for us, because she makes sweeping, baseless accusations against us and the school has to respond just the same even though there is no evidence of misbehavior on our part.

Tread lightly in the public school system, but at the same time don't give up and hold your ground.