Getting Even With Your Bad Neighbor, Stalker or Abuser

The short answer for people considering this is "don't".

Do you remember what the playground supervisor used to say, "the person that punches back always gets caught". It's true. If you try to get even, you'll only end up giving your adversary ammunition against you for the same things you are accusing them of.

With charges pending against you the case then gets more difficult and more risky. As hard as it is to not strike back sometimes, in the long run it's much better for you to not. It gives you added credibility in court, less to answer for yourself when being cross examined by opposing counsel, and less to make you nervous on the stand, talking to police and the like.

As good as a good "get even" feels, what feels even better, we have found out, is the ability to talk to police, lawyers and judges with 100% complete confidence and not having to really "think" before answering questions to make sure you are telling the right story and without having to put a positive spin on anything. It adds to your demeanor and confidence when under fire.

As hard as it may be, don't do it! It is far, far more healthy, and legally advantageous to take the high road and forgive (not condone or forget) that person and allow yourself to move on.

On the flip side, you could always start a web site and use that to vent your frustrations. That being said, for your own good, don't use names, pictures, maps or the like, that could present additional legal complications. Since I know our harasser and her family obsessively views this site (or used to before I banned their computers) just hoping to find a reason to sue me, I will say that I have not, will not and don't care enough to "get even"...karma will take care of that for us. You can usually count on karma to give people what they deserve in the long run. It's a long wait sometimes, but it usually works.

I do realize that this is not what most of the people that will read this page expected to read, I also know very few people actually got this far down the page, but if you did, and are still reading this, please, consider what I said. Look at the big picture, not the heat of the moment.